Shane Conder's Whateveritis of Nothing

I suppose since Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans are still popular, it shouldn't come as quite such a surprise that a Seattle-based soda company is marketing some really weird new beverages for the holidays season...

...like Smoked Salmon Paté.

... or Brussels Sprout with Prosciutto.

... or Wild Herb Stuffing.

... or Corn on the Cob.

And what's with their hokey labels? Where are the nice, happy pink fishes with the empty eye sockets and the gaping mouths? I could have made better labels! But at least the holiday packs come with a pre-moistened towelette.

I can't even handle my husband eating smoked salmon in the same house, let alone having the juice around. Ugh! But I guess it's cheaper than buying the fish itself? Maybe drink it with a jigger of cream and some crackers and call it lox?

There are, of course, other flavors like Brussels Sprout with Prosciutto. While the sprouts sound cool, and it's a neat green color, I have issues with the pig-juicing process.

For beverage connoisseurs tired of turkey-and-gravy or green-beans-and-casserole-flavored sodas, there's a new choice being offered this year by specialty U.S. soda manufacturer Jones Soda Co.: salmon.
Jones Soda, the Seattle company that scored a hit during the last two holiday seasons with its turkey-and-gravy-flavored sodas, said it is offering the orange-hued fish-flavored drink this year in a nod to the Pacific Northwest's salmon catch.

"When you smell it, it's got that smoked salmon aroma," said Peter van Stolk, chief executive of Jones Soda.

...

Asked whether he liked his new salmon soda, van Stolk said: "I cannot finish a bottle, I just can't."

More at: CNN Money: Seattle's Jones Soda offering salmon-flavored soda

I really can't blame the guy. It sounds vile. (Although the Pumpkin Pie does sound promising)

Posted by sorsha on November 16, 2005 10:56 PM | Permalink